midi...Madness:House of Fun
Chastity It Out
Chas and S@ndwitch (her daughter also known as Belt Buckle), present:
How to lose weight the FUN way.......lose inches off your arse (ass) by reading ahead and.....ROTFLYAO, (Rolling On The Floor Laughing Your Arse Off.)
Watch out in your local store for the video release...the entire exercise range will be launched in the New Year!!!
The Belly Buster Jokes...tighten that GUT!
The Inner Thigh Slimmer........lose that fat!!
The Upper Torso Ticklers...........Tit for Tat !!
IT'S FUN IT'S EASY AND.....IT'S OFFENSIVE!
If you are : Blonde, Ethnic, Male, Animal lover, Religious, Homosexual, a Senior Citizen, Female or just someone who deserves to be picked on.......we are sure you will find a joke that applies to you or someone you know.
We are still working on this page ....but email us any thing you wish to contribute and.....Sign our damn guestbook!
Offensive Juvenille Jokes
Senior Citizen Jokes
A: A Urinal:
**Three old bitties were sitting around a table slurping and dribblng tea. The 1st woman mentioned that her memory was failing her, ".....it's so bad i couldn't remember if i was getting in or out of bed yesterday,..." The 2nd replied hers was just as bad, she couldn't remember if she was getting dressed or undressed when she went to her wardrobe. The 3rd woman proudly said that her memory was excellent........sorry we've forgotten the punchline.......
**Three old bitties were sitting around a table slurping and dribblng tea. The 1st woman mentioned that her memory was failing her, ".....it's so bad i couldn't remember if i was getting in or out of bed yesterday,..." The 2nd replied hers was just as bad, she couldn't remember if she was getting dressed or undressed when she went to her wardrobe. The 3rd woman proudly said that her memory was excellent.."..knock on wood" to which she added.."who's there?
Q: Whats invisible and smells like dog food?
A: Old people"s farts.
Indecent Religious Jokes
Revolting Racial & Ethnic Jokes
A: Abzorba The Greek!
Q: How do you tell if an airliner comes from Italy?
A: Theres pubic hairs under the wings!
Q: How are Redneck children taught to put on their underwear?
A: Yellow in front, brown behind!
"Q: Why don't Italians take showers?
A; Because oil and water dont mix!
**An Aussie walked into a bar with a frog on his head...."where'd you get that?"asked the barman. "Well.." the frog replied "It started out as a wart on my arse.... "
Q: Why did the Irishwoman think her husband was unfaithful?
A: None of the children looked like him.!
Q: Why did the Polish housewife sell her freezer?
A: She got tired of cutting the ice into little squares to fit into the trays!
Q: Whats a weiner?
A: The first person across the finish line at a Mexican track meet!
Q: Whats a fart?
A: A Greek love call!
Q: Why do they put a pile of shit in the corner at an Aboriginal wedding?
A: To keep the flies off the bride!
Q: What did the Maori get after sex?
A: 10 years!
Disability & Medical Jokes
A: You meet new people everyday!
Q: Did you hear about the blind gynocologist?
A: He was a lip reader!
**A blind man and a pilot were flying around the country. The pilot has a heart attack and dies. The blind man radios to the station and screams to the person on the other line...Ï am blind, the pilot just died and we are flying upside down....what do i do?" The man replies.."how do you know you are upside down if you are blind?" he replied.."because i shit my pants and its running up my neck!
Q: How can you tell an efficient nurse?
A: Shes the one that can make a patient without disturbing the bed!
Appalling Animal Jokes
Q: What did the young doe say as she ran bleeding into the woods?
A: Thats the last time i do it for 10 bucks!
Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant and a prostitute?
A: A 2 tonne pick-up!
Q: Whats the ultimate embarassment for a women?
A: Taking her German sheperd to the vet and being told he has the clap!
Q: Why did the police arrest the woman who swam the English Channel for cruelty to animals?
A: She kept her pussy under water for 14 hours!
Raunchy Sex Jokes
A: Because some don't know if they are coming or going!
Q: What happens if you stick your palm up a Gypsy womans dress?
A: You get your palm read every 28 days!
Q: What does a condom and a woman have in common?
A: If it's not on your dick, it's in your wallet!
Q:How can you tell a gay bar?
A: All the stools are turnt upside down!
**A cowboy, unknowingly walked into a gay bar, he exclaimed "I'm so thirsty i could lick the sweat off cows balls!" From the back off the room came the cry... "MOO MOO"
Q: How do they seperate the men from the boys in San Francisco?
A: With a crowbar!
Q: What are 3 things homosexuals like most?
A: To eat, drink and be Mary!
Mother /Father /Brother/ Sister Jokes
We have no heading for these Jokes
Visit these pages as well...but hey...not till your finished with ours!!
Yo Momma.....A great page ...you should enjoy!
Hundreds of Blonde jokes!!
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Visitors since 5th June1997